“Now I stand before to you deeply touched and bumbled by the honour and responsibility bestowed on me.”
You can’t make this stuff up, and I definitely don’t have to.
[security of the first world]
The Onion reports that retired S1Ws are being recalled to active duty. After all they have already done to fight the power, you’d think we could let them enjoy their golden years.
Here’s a zany clip of the S1Ws in full effect.
[why korea needs to be reunified]
It’ll make it easier to mail things there.
[ridin’ nerdy]
When I was maybe 10 or 11, there was this girl at summer camp named Leah Spieler. She had straight brown hair down to her shoulders that curled in at the bottom, feline eyes and pouting lips, and breasts — real, actual breasts — and so I was in love with her. We hadn’t actually talked or anything, but I was still hoping to ask her to the camp dance, so when another boy, taller and more popular than me, beat me to the punch, I was devastated. I spent the night of the dance hiding in my bunk, listening over and over on my Walkman to borrowed cassettes of “Weird Al” Yankovic’s first three albums.
I grew up — learning, among other things, that there is better breakup music in this world than “Slime Creatures from Outer Space” — but thankfully “Weird Al” never did. Today, from DKNY, the link for the video above arrived in my inbox, along with this note:
I’m sort of amazed that he’s managed to sustain a career for, jesus, 23 years now, not to mention that he actually manages to pretty capably flow (shit, better than Fiddy). Plus it references the Star Wars Holiday Special, which I appreciate…
Likewise. And in case you’re not familiar with the original song, it’s “Ridin'” by Chamillionaire, featuring the ever-incomprehensible Krayzie Bone, and you can see the video here.
[beep-beep, mmm-beep-beep, mmm-yeah!]
BBC’s coverage of Nepal is always excellent, and today is no different, as they are the only ones brave enough to cover the Nepal VW Beetle rally. Enjoy.
[the dark side of music blogging]
Enjoy this fascinating look at the dark underbelly of music blogging, starrring Aziz Ansari (via Another Form of Relief).
[soundtrack to milfs]
“Nobody loves you like your mama loves you / But who’s lovin’ your mama? I am! I am!” Genius. Watch the video. (Via 2 Many Scenes.)
[oh, lordi!]
Hard Rock Hallelujah (Audio | Video) by Lordi
The Eurovision Song Contest is usually an ABBAesque cheesefest, but this year’s winners are different. Still hopelessly cheesy, yes, but different. Taking a page from GWAR, Lordi — the most popular thing to come out of Finland since Nokia — is a metal band that only appears in ridiculous monster constumes and that indulges in parodic Satanic lyrics. From their contest-winning anthem “Rock and Roll Hallelujah”:
On the day of Rockoning
It’s who dares, wins
You will see the jokers soon’ll be the new kings
Apparently the day of Rockoning has come, and these jokers reign supreme. In Europe, anyway.
[concerned with your size and hardness?]
Fascinating copy from a spam email I received:
Concerned with your size and hardness? Study this, here’s the answer!
A gift given in secret soothes anger, and a bribe concealed in the cloak pacifies great wrath. God gives every bird its food, but does not always drop it into the nest. A creaking door hangs longest.
Indeed.
[the greatest headline ever]
From The Chicago Sun-Times: Rosie weds longtime girlfriend, slams Bush.