Dear Mayor Bloomberg,
It’s snowing again, and I for one don’t think it’s funny. At all.
Back in December when it first snowed, I thought it was pretty cool, but then it all just sat there for months turning gray. A leaky hydrant just up Bond Street created a lake of ice that had to be chopped apart and stacked up by city workers. And then it snowed again on Tuesday, and that was totally lame.
So I get up and look out my window today, and what do I see? Snow! Mr. Mayor, my wife was planning to garden today ? her friend was coming over to help and everything ? and then this happened.
These snowfalls are an assault on our freedoms. They hinder us, trap us inside, limit our ability to enjoy this fair city. They are costly to the government and bad for business, unless your business is selling bags of salt. (Maybe the salt merchants are behind this?) And the snow is so very, very not funny.
So please, Mayor Mikey: make it stop.
Correction: It’s not snow. It’s some snowlike substance that falls like snow but then melts actual snow on contact, creating slush puddles the size of Lake Eerie. Truly, it is the season of the Oobleck.